Black Velvet
by DonnysGirl87
Summary: TMNT 2012 AU. Five years ago the world as the turtles knew it ended. Five years ago April lost the love of her life. Five years ago Donnie made a promise that was impossible to keep. Five years ago April fell in love again. Five years later Donnie was broken and April will do everything she can to save him. ((Will contain Violence, Sexual themes & Non-con, you have been warned.))
1. Prologue

Prologue

Five years. It has been five years since the world we knew ended and we were there, all us, standing right by the switch. We should of known from the start that we couldn't of stopped it, no matter how many times I look back over it. It was near to impossible. I accept that now.

For all that time April and I have been on our own. You really get to know someone in that time when you spend a complete twenty-four seven in their company, rituals, habits... longings.

I should have kept up with the others. I shouldn't have hesitated. We would be with them now if I were that split second faster. That's all it took a split second and now it's just us.

God only knows what it must have looked like to Leo as the massive quake split the city asunder. April and I fell into what must of looked like gaping oblivion. I'll never forget that desperate, blind panic that filled my oldest brother's face just before the shelf we were standing on dropped. A horrible knowing that there was nothing he could do. Oh my god how he struggled in Raphael's grip. Snatched back from our fate even as he reached down for us.

I can still hear his scream.

They must have thought we were dead and I still don't blame them if they think that. If they aren't looking for us I bear no grudges but we will never stop looking for them. I will march through this fractured wasteland until I find them or die trying. It's just that simple; my only clause is that April is kept safe because I promised.

I promised…

 **XXXXXX**

 **((Bit of a teaser huh? I've been working on this fanfic for a couple of years now on and off and decided to take the plunge. This is ploughing into territory that I never thought I would venture into but over that time I have summoned my courage. Welcome to my mad mind and hold tight, this one is going to be quite a ride! XD Please, I beg you don't eat me!))**


	2. The Record Player

***Takes a deep breath* Okay folks. It's about time I took the plunge with this one. Parts of this story will take me completely out of my comfort zone but you'll never accomplish anything if you don't take the risk. This story came to me whilst I listening to the song Black Velvet by Alannah Myles on the radio in the car (some years ago now) and there was always several lines or so that always reminded me of what April might think about Donnie. Then I thought 'I wish there was a story out there that just had those two in it, completely separated from everyone else...' hence this fiction 'Black Velvet' was born. I've wanted to write an Apritello fan fic for a while, ever since I wrote scenes about the pair of them in 'The Choice' and my oneshot 'The Sweetest Pain'.**

 **And so, here it is my dearest readers. Take a breath and take my hand. 'Black Velvet' awaits you...**

 **XXXX**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own TMNT in anyway shape or form or the lyrics to the song Black Velvet.**

 **XXXX**

April raised her hands up to her shoulders, trying to suppress the shiver as she cast her gaze about the wasteland they trudged through.

"Cold?"

April shook her head, raising her eyes to the horizon which subsequently knitted her brow into a frown.

"Sun's fading," he tall companion cut in before she could voice her thoughts. "There's some buildings up ahead."

"That such a good idea? Remember what happened last time?"

Her friend stiffened. "Don't remind me," he said flatly, instinctively reaching for his self adapted crossbow.

"Sorry Donnie."

He waved a hand without looking at up. "Don't worry about it," he muttered, his gaze now focussed on the outcropping of tumble down buildings. "Cover me?"

April brought her rifle to bear and nodded. "Always."

April thought she saw the ghost of a smile trace the mutant turtle's mouth as he jogged off ahead, swiftly vanishing in the bleak landscape. She still wondered how he did it. A smile of her own crept across her face and she felt the reassuring warmth spread a through her chest.

April dropped to one knee, steadying her stance and peered down the scope. They'd been lucky the past week. No ambushes and no animal attacks. They had been incredible fortunate. The redhead felt a prickle of apprehension rise the hairs on the back of her neck. Their luck could only last so long though…

For a full minute nothing happened and April felt the tension in her shoulders relax. Once more it appeared luck was on their side- There was a sudden shout and a half second later a twisted creature leapt out of the fractured building.

"Vermin," the word slipped out as a deep frown took her features. They were mutant remnants from the Rat King's experiments that now roved across the entire continent it seemed.

The creature no stuck out in the open whipped its head around, whiskers frantically twitching as it sought an escape. April caught her breath as a crossbow bolt shot out of the building. The arrow caught the monster in the eye. There was an ugly squeal that rang out across the expanse and the vermin collapsed, twisting in its death throes before it lay still.

Donatello then strode out of the building and prodded the vermin with his crossbow. He looked up and signalled the all clear. April allowed the scope's sights to settle over the turtle's features as he looked back down at the mutant rat. The girl smiled fondly, lost in past memories when she caught movement behind her friend.

A sudden intake of breath and April swiftly zeroed in on her target. Donatello just sensed the presence as the second vermin leapt to attack. He fell back and April squeezed the trigger.

A sharp crack resounded about them and the second vermin fell still at the turtle's feet. Still regarding everything down the scope April watched Don raise a gauntlet clad had to his breast as he sighed in relief. He then looked up and waved to her mouthing 'Thank you' before shaking his head and no doubt swearing to himself. The redhead suppressed a giggle and shouldered her rifle, running up to the dilapidated buildings.

"Call yourself a ninja Don?" she teased.

Donatello looked annoyed at first but a smile soon played across his features as he stood up. "Shut up," he uttered, reaching out to playfully cuff the back of April's head.

She dodged it easily and beamed back like a Cheshire cat.

"Like shooting cans on your grandparent's farm, huh?"

"Yep!" April bounced on her heels, still grinning. "Like me to show you how?"

"No thank you," he smiled gently back. Donnie hated guns but a long time ago April had convinced him that they were a necessary evil. He still refused to use one though.

"So, what's inside then?" April inclined her head to change the subject.

"Oh, I think you might like it," Don answered with a somewhat smug expression.

"What? What is it?"

Donatello nodded to the building. "Have a look for yourself," he quirked a smile.

"Oh stop teasing me Don!" April chuckled, punching him lightly in the plastron and made to duck under his arm.

He immediately spun about and snagged her playfully about the waist. "Hey! Where'd you think you're going?" He laughed.

"Let go D!" April giggled.

"Say it!" he gave her an affectionate squeeze.

"No way Mr.! Who saved your ass just now?"

"Aw, c'mon say it! You're beginning to hurt my feelings."

April wriggled a little more and finally relented. "Fine," she glanced up over her shoulder, being greeted by that gap tooth grin she adored so much. "You're my hero."

A gentleness entered Donnie's eyes and the mischievousness left his voice. "And you're mine."

April reached up and lightly tapped the turtle's cheek. "You softie," she murmured.

Don let her go then, uttering a nervous cough before gesturing to the broken doorway. "Ladies first."

April held back her disappointment as Donnie pulled away. She would have liked that innocent playfulness, that sweet affection to have lasted just a little bit longer but he pulled back just like he always did. She was still uncertain as to why. So much time had gone by now and as painful as the past could be, the best thing to do was to let it go sometimes.

April patted his wrist, offering the young man a sweet smile of gratitude before ducking into the building. One look around and she stopped in her tracks. "Oh, wow."

"Not bad is it?"

April shook her head. "Don, you are the master of understatement. I'd say we hit the jackpot," she murmured.

"Well, I wouldn't say that until we've had a proper look around but on the other hand," Don shrugged. "Yeah, we could have struck gold as it were."

The redhead shook her head again, suppressing a chuckle and rubbed his arm before venturing further in. "Don't ever change D."

The interior of the abandoned building appeared to have been a bric a brac shop of sorts, maybe even antiques but by the obvious disarray of the place it was pretty difficult to tell.

Donnie laid a hand on her shoulder and hiked a thumb over to the door. "You have a scout around, I'll deal with the bodies to make sure we don't attract any unwanted attention."

"'Kay Don," April smiled, eyes lingering on him as he left. She sighed sadly. "Come back soon," she whispered.

XXXXXX

An hour later the sun had fallen and April had to cut her her search short but just before she did something caught her eye in the failing light.

"You're kidding me!" she whispered.

"What's up April?"

'Hearing of a hawk,' she thought with a grin. "Donnie look, it's a record player. You think it would still work?"

Don stood behind her and rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Technically yes, it should still work. I mean the sound is created from the vibrations caused by the needle on the record's grooves so you only need a kinetic action for it to pla-"

"Don, you're doing it again."

The soft spoken mutant stammered into silence. "Sorry."

"You know you never have to apologise when you do that," April said gently.

"Natural reflex action," he smiled sheepishly.

"So, what do you think?"

"Sure," he nodded simply. "This one doesn't explicitly run on electricity," he pointed to the back of the player. "It has an external crank."

"Urgh," April rolled her eyes and brought a hand to her head. "Nice April, how the hell did you miss that?" she muttered under her breath.

Don rubbed her shoulder. "Easy to overlook," he offered kindly. "I think I saw a box of records in the far corner over there," he pointed.

"There are?" April's eyebrows shot up. "Where?"

Don pointed and April darted over and began to pull through the debris. An excited yelp confirmed that she had found what she sought.

"Oh man, look at all this," she began lifting random sleeves and dropping them back when one in particular made her freeze. A rising sense of nostalgia swept through her and tears began to glimmer at the back of her eyes as a sad smile pulled at her mouth.

April sat back and let her fingers trace across the title, 'Black Velvet.' She must have stayed like that for a while for the next thing she knew, Don was crouched behind her.

"April, is there something wrong."

April shook her head, quickly dragging a the sleeve of her coat across her eyes. "No," she said quietly. "It's just when my dad used to work late nights I used to stay at my aunt's house. She was my babysitter. She seemed to play this song all the time. It-it used to help me sleep, it made me happy," she sniffed.

April felt Don's hand on her shoulder and he squeezed it comfortingly. "Do you want to play it?"

She looked up at him and beamed through her re-emerging tears. "I would love that Donnie."

"C'mon," he inclined his head and helped her up. "Let's get that record player working."

XXXX

Two freeze dried ration packs, three hours and sic vinyls later April was still sat next to the record player which was now placed in the centre of the room on the floor.

Yes, it was a risk to have any sound announce their presence but Donnie indulged her. Anything to keep her happy, anything to make her smile just as he always did. April sighed, her eyes wandering to where the tall mutant stood, just outside the doorway. His own eyes were focussed on the darkling night outside, her guardian, her companion, her friend…. Her best friend.

"You might want to change that record April."

The redhead started, only then realising the record that she was playing had skipped. "Damn it," she hissed under her breath. She removed the disc and without hesitation replaced the first one she had played.

' _Mississippi in the middle of a dry spell_

 _Jimmy Rodgers on the Victrola up high_

 _Mama's dancin' with baby on her shoulder_

 _The sun is settin' like molasses in the sky…'_

April swayed whilst hugging her knees, looking back at Donatello. "Better?"

He didn't turn away from his vigil. "Yeah, make it the last one though April. We can't have it playing all night, okay?"

April stared at the record player sadly, knowing full well that they couldn't take it with them. Too much unnecessary weight to carry. Well, if that was the case there was one thing she wanted to do before she brought back the silence.

April lifted the needle and reset it, making Donnie incline his head slightly. "April, what are you doing?"

The young woman stood. "Dance with me Donnie."

The mutant finally turned around. "Sorry?"

"Dance with me," she smiled, rising her hand to him.

Don shook his head. "I-I really can't dance April."

"Then I'll show you," she snagged his hand and pulled him into the building, protesting every step of the way.

"Someone needs to keep watch April," he tried again.

"For the length of one four minute song, I think we'll be okay."

"A lot can happen in four minutes-"

April pressed two pale fingers against Don's mouth. He instantly quietened. "Donnie hush. Four minutes to dance to a song I probably won't be able to listen to again. Would that be okay with you?"

She lowered her fingers and looked searchingly into the turtle's bright chestnut red eyes. April saw the indecision. He was at a sudden loss of what to do. The smartest person she would ever have the privilege of knowing, had no idea as to what to do next. Donatello without a clue. It was endearing.

Just as the music began to play he suddenly seemed to find the answer that eluded him. There was a yearning sparkle in his eyes. "O-okay," he nodded awkwardly.

April smiled gently, leading one of his hands to her waist and raising the other with her own. Twenty-three years old and he still appeared to be that nervous, fawning fifteen year old she had met all that time ago.

As Alannah Myles's sultry voice filled the airs, April encouraged her friend to move. She knew Don had a lot more grace than he was showing but convincing him to let go, even a little bit was hard. She couldn't believe that even after all this time he would still be this shy. In the end April did the only thing that she could. She got lost in the music. She closed her eyes and forgot where she was, relaxed into Donatello's tentative hold and let the lyrics take her away to a different world, a different time. April didn't even realise she was singing until she heard her own voice.

" _The way he moved, it was a sin, so sweet and true_

 _Always wanting more, he'd leave you longing for-"_

She instinctively linked her hands behind Don's neck and let her head fall against his shoulder. April heard the slight intake of breath and continued to sing, not missing a beat.

" _Black velvet and that little boy's smile_

 _Black velvet and that slow southern style_

 _A new religion that'll bring her to your knees_

 _Black velvet if you please_

 _Ev'ry word of ev'ry song that he sang was for you…"_

She felt Donnie readjust his hold on her, a hand slipping across her shoulders and pressing her closer. April smiled. He was getting bolder. She prayed that this time, it would last.

She allowed her fingers to travel and gently traced the soft skin that fused to the underside of his shell. From the nape of his neck to his shoulders, under the long leather coat that he now wore, and back again. It was a beautiful texture, it was addictive. She did it again. April had no idea what she could be doing to Donatello, all she knew was how reassuring the feel of his skin was beneath her hands. She felt safe.

April then heard Don huff out a tremoring breath that he no doubt had been holding in. Then suddenly he rested his chin atop her head. He was shaking.

"D, you okay?"

The tone was low, soft and trembling but for of sincerity. "Yes."

His hold had become tighter and April felt his snout nuzzle into her hair, feeling the warm breath against her scalp as he breathed her in. The sensation sent an internal shiver down her spine and a settling tingle spread across the base of her neck. She couldn't help but breath in and slowly out at that wonderful feeling. In five years this was the closest he had ever been. Maybe, whatever had pulled him back had gone, melted away by her gentle persuasion. April could only hope.

The song finally ended and the record spun and scratched silence. The couple swayed for a few moments more until they just stood there, enveloped in the other's arms as if time was suddenly standing still. Don's hand drifted to the back of her head, fingers stroking the soft locks and gently sliding down the plait she had taken to wearing as her hair had grown longer.

April smiled, listening to his thrumming heart as she ran her hand under his coat and across his plastron. She had waited so long for this attention. She could stay like that forever and never want for anything more.

Donnie clung to her, almost desperately for a few moments more and lifted his head. "Ap-April?"

April reluctantly raised her head and was suddenly captured by the intense glow in his almond eyes. A longing, a deep and mesmerising desire reflected in those bright orbs but there was something else there too, something she couldn't quite place.

"What is it Donnie?" she murmured.

For a second he hesitated, clearly trapped between two conflicting thoughts in his mind. Donatello made to move in and suddenly it was like a switch had been flicked off. He instantly pushed back, blinking furiously as he held her at arm's length.

"Donnie?" she raised a hand to the large one rested upon her shoulder.

"Get the record player April," he was fighting back an obvious lump in his throat. "It's making too much damn noise," he whipped his hands away from her and turned swiftly on his heel, the leather hem of his coat sweeping about his ankles as he hurried from the building.

"Don? Donnie? Donatello!" April's voice had gone from, concern, pleading, to utter indignantly in the matter of a second. "Hamato Donatello answer me right now damn it!" then there was upset.

He never answered her.

Unshed tears stung at her eyes as April wrapped her arms about herself. The redhead kicked at the ground with a little shout and stubbornly tried to bite back the rising upset. In the end she brought a hand to her face as she sank to the floor.

What was she doing wrong? More importantly why did she continue to vie for Don's affection? April shook her head, because she knew exactly how he felt about her, only he kept throwing up walls, not to block April out but to seal himself in and she had no idea how to break through them.

A tear managed to break free but April swiftly brushed it away. Leaning back she lifted the needle on the record player and carefully removed the record and slipped it back in its sleeve. There she paused and after a second's consideration tucked it into her bag. She gathered up the others that she had been playing, testing the weight and finally shrugged. "The hell with it," she muttered and shoved all of them into her bag. April didn't care how heavy they were, the girl doubted she would ever come across any more and even though she may never get to listen to them again, at least she would have the music with her in some way.

April then set out her bedroll and pushing it out across the floor before settling down on it and pulled up the thick blanket until it scratched her chin. She didn't care. The young woman breathed in, gazing across the dusty floor and into the shadows that had started to cling to the corners of the room. She began listening to the sounds of the falling night, hearing Donatello practice katas with his repaired naginata. He was no doubt trying to erase what had just happened from his mind. His frustration was clear in every punctuated sound of exertion that he made.

April buried her nose deeper into her blanket and sniffed sadly. It was that little ritual he unwittingly played through every time she tried to get close to him and his guard was down. April waited. She knew what was soon to come and it broke her heart every time she heard it.

The katas continued until there was a gasp and a small broken cry (which was a little unusual). Her features creased. A dull thud confirmed that her friend had collapsed against the building's wall. She knew Don thought that she never heard him but she did, each and every time. April recalled the first time this had happened around four years ago. Frustration and then sorrowful whimpers that had had her from their shelter to see what was wrong.

Donatello had looked so ashamed, so embarrassed, so- mortified that April had caught him looking so vulnerable that the next time it occurred, (to save face for him), she had let him be. It hurt though because she couldn't bear to hear him cry no matter how quiet it was, no matter how suppressed he tried to make it. It cut through her soul like a hot knife through butter.

April sighed. If only he would open up to her, if only he would share his troubles they could stop this horrible dance that they consistently started falling into. What could she possibly do? He was nearly as stubborn as she was, which was quite the revelation when it finally struck her.

A soft but husky voice then started to sing and April shut her eyes. This was as bad as Donatello's ritual could get. That was then April knew how deeply distraught Donnie was, singing the japanese lullaby from his childhood as a vain attempt to comfort himself.

"Oh Donnie, I'm sorry," she whispered. April had loved the song the first time she had heard it but now it only left her feeling hollow, empty and entirely useless.

April remembered every detail of that terrible night with perfect, bone chilling clarity. She had been at her lowest ebb. When she- when it happened, she felt that her own world (besides the one she was living in), crumble about her. The teenager she was, everything that she had hoped to be, everything that she was going to be was robbed from her in one night of blood and intense pain. There had been so much blood…. She bit her bottom lip at the memory. There had been so little that Donatello could do. As the worst of the pain passed and her sobs refused to abate he had gathered April into his arms and held her close. He sang to her that whole night, that lullabye (she forgot what it was called), over and over in his wonderful soft voice.

That's when it had happened, despite everything that had occurred, how desperate, how grief stricken and broken she felt, April still couldn't believe it. During her darkest hours she had fallen in love with Donatello. The redhead had always harboured deep affections for the young mutant. He was so brilliant, so attentive, so- loyal that her fondness for him couldn't be denied but her love belonged to someone else at the time.

A year after the incident April had acted upon her feelings and the dance had begun. She swept a thumb over her watering eyes and buried her face into her arm. She just felt so lost. A troubled sleep finally took April, just as Donatello's lullabye faded away to soft heartfelt sobs.

XXXX

What was he thinking? What had he been thinking? ' _What the hell is wrong with you Don?!'_ he internally berated himself with a wretched sniff as he snatched up his naginata leant just outside the doorway. Absently he spun it and slammed the base into the ground as he grappled to get a hold of his feelings. He pinched the bridge of his snout with calloused fingers and with eyes squeezed shut he took several deep breaths to slow the erratic beats of his treacherous heart.

Donatello had not let himself get so deeply embroiled and lost in his emotions for April in the longest time. He'd nearly given in to them. He'd almost, almost- He mentally slapped himself, cursing his weakness.

Donnie brought his weapon to bear, spinning it around in a series of increasingly intricate moves, a jab, a strike, a block, an attack.

He had decided, no, he'd accepted the fact five years ago when the world that he and his brothers knew ended, when precious lives were lost, when promises had been- broken, that he had no right to pursue April. Don had made two promises and one was shattered only days of it being made.

A frustrated cry escaped as he swung the naginata wide and twisted it clockwise, hand over arm before he paused. A sweat was building and his long coat was starting to hamper his movements. Don shrugged off the raiment of clothing, throwing it away roughly before resuming his katas.

The fact that April persisted to try and gain his affections only made things more difficult. Even now Donnie couldn't understand why. How could she possible see him that way after all that had happened? After all that she had lost? If it had been under more 'normal' circumstances Donnie would have been ecstatic, overwhelmed and simply stunned but now? In this world? He was frustrated, desperate and confused. He wanted her to stop, but then again he didn't. He loved the way she sought to hold his hand as they travelled side by side; how she would put her arm about him when he felt that there now five years mission to find his family (their family) seemed to be getting them nowhere. She would kiss him on the cheek and squeeze his shoulder but that was okay. April was reassuring him. It was a kiss of friendship, as he soon discovered after the very first time she'd done it, for saving her life and never giving up on her. It seemed so very long ago now.

Another upset cry escaped his throat as he thrust the bladed staff forward into the falling darkness. Sweat began to saturate his mask but that wasn't the only wetness dampening the purple fabric. His emotions were rising again. Past and present memories crowded together and his near perfect form began to get clumsy, suffering from his sudden inability to keep his bubbling feelings in check. Donnie spun the naginata above his head, as an image of his broken promise flashed through his mind's eye.

He gasped, his hands fumbled and the blade swept too close. Donnie yelped and let go, throwing himself back as the sharp edge found the exposed skin of his fingers. The naginata tumbled down in front of him and even in the moonlight the unmistakable sheen of red screamed up at him.

"Idiot!" but even as the hushed, angry curse at his own stupidity sounded, the sight of the blood on his hands had him issue a half broken cry. The mutant staggered into the wall, his carapace clumping dully against it as he did so. The turtle whimpered as he stared at his crimson stained digits. He had tried, he had tried so hard to keep his promise even as hell seemed to rear up all around them.

A tightness started to fill his chest. Just now though, in that building, the music playing with April in his arms, none of that seemed to matter. It was pushed back that he'd almost forgot it was there. He'd only meant to make her happy but he got carried away, too carried away. He recalled her fingers tracing the sensitive skin inside the top ridge of his shell. She had repeated the action, over and over. It had drove him crazy. Donnie hadn't even realised he'd been holding his breath until he heard himself exhale with a shudder. That's when he felt himself draw April in closer, bury his nose in her golden red locks and breathed her in. He had never felt more content in his life.

He wished the music had kept playing. It felt as if he were under the control of some wonderful spell. But the music stopped and reality had soon set in again but not before his mind started playing games with his aching heart. In a moment of madness the veil had dropped and he felt his soul laid bear for all to see and he didn't care. To hell with everything else that plagued him! Didn't he deserve even a small modicum of happiness? Even in its smallest measure? Who was there to judge him?

Then there was a voice, a voice from the past echoed through his mind. The kiss on his lips, the yearning inside got trapped behind a shield and abruptly slammed down. Catching himself he had pulled back, the record player scratching mockingly at him and tears springing unexpectedly to his eyes even as he snapped at her. He was. He was his own judge and that ghost, that ghost on his shoulder was always there to remind him.

He didn't want to push April away. He didn't mean to upset her and ignore her shouts and demands but if he had turned, if he had spoken, his forced resolve would have shattered. Don would have crumbled in front of her, he just knew it and he couldn't allow it. He just couldn't. He had to stay strong. He had to stay firm, for April's sake, he had too.

But the determined thought didn't match the expression that was currently filling Donatello's features. He brought his uninjured hand to his mouth, eyes squeezed tight shut as he struggled to push his conflicted feelings back down but it only left a dull ache in his breast. The coiling turmoil caused Don to jolt as a distressed hiccup of a gasp escaped.

' _Keep it together Donnie, c'mon man you're stronger than this.'_

Don roughly shook his head. "No- no I'm not," he whispered wretchedly.

Only half a moment later he heard himself singing, the soothing lullabye that Splinter used to sing to him and his brothers to get them to sleep or comfort them when they were so much younger. He couldn't maintain it though. It wasn't fair. It just wasn't fair. He didn't ask for this. He didn't want this. It was a burden on his heart and he just wanted it to be over, he just wanted it to stop. He wanted- ' _Oh damn it all to hell!'_

He wanted her.

The constriction in his chest worsened and a woeful whimper slipped past his lips. The voice came back.

' _Keep her safe Don, keep_ _them_ _safe. Ya know I trust ya. I know ya won't let me down…'_

A soft sob broke loose and Donnie brought both hands to his face, ignoring his sliced fingers that stained his olive skin scarlet. Blood mingled with wretched salty tears that streamed thick and unrelenting. The misery heaved at his chest as he sobbed, ignoring the chill in the air that the night bought, making him shiver. It just reflected how he felt inside.

In all honesty Donnie didn't know how much more of this he could endure. He was falling apart from the seams. He could feel it. Yes, he was ninja but without Splinter there to offer his guidence, some meaningful words of wisdom, Don was floundering. He concentrate enough to meditate, hell, there wasn't even any working technology left to tinker with to distract himself in this world!

He kicked at the ground with an angered cry. No technology for goodness sake! His brain was starved for knowledge, a knowledge that it had devoured greedily everyday of his life until civilisation collapsed. Now what did he have? A self adapted crossbow and a wind-up radio that just spat out static. There was nothing absolutely nothing else to focus on. Yes, the quest for his brothers, his father but that was becoming increasingly difficult. Half the time he felt that he was just leading them in circles.

No. There was no escape from reality. Not really.

April. The first thought when he woke up in the morning and the last one at night. It was only April.

A faint mournful wail rose up his throat and his shell scraped down the brick wall behind him as his legs gave out to the weight of his burdened soul. As the tears took over, the most pained of his thoughts pushed forward. It shamed him to even think it, but if the older teen hadn't seen him stumble, if he hadn't pushed him out of harm's way, none of this would have happened. April's fiance would be there instead of him, just as it should be. The promise would have never have been made. It would have never have been broken and April would still have everything she deserved.

Donnie wrapped arms about himself as his misery overwhelmed him and unlike other times, he couldn't quiet them, those awful, shameful sobs.

"Forgive me, please forgive me," he wept. "Casey, I'm so sorry."


	3. World's End Part 1

**Right, time for the first of the flashbacks :)**

 **Note: When I wrote about earthquakes and the underground I give credit to this page where I part lifted a line for Donnie to say. I do not own it! _r/askscience/comments/2o128r/how_safe_would_someone_be_if_they_were_inside_of/_**

Chapter 2 World's End Part 1

 _5 years ago…_

 _It had been a quiet day in the lair and Donnie had spent most of it in his lab de-fragging his computer for the best part of three hours, whilst idly re-wiring a circuit board for the Shellraiser's on board navigation system when he heard a tentative tap on the door frame. His head bobbed up, blinking, slightly blinded by the monotonous task he was engaged in._

 _"Donnie? You got a minute?"_

 _The eighteen year old emitted a half laugh at the absurdity of the question. "Oh April, I always have a minute for you! You know you never have to knock," he smiled warmly._

 _April entered the lab, casting an almost furtive glance over her shoulder before leaning against the door to close it. At this Donnie frowned slightly._

 _"What do you need April?" he said, trying to allay the sudden worry that abruptly nestled in his breast._

 _"I just wanted to talk."_

 _"Sure," Donnie nodded, laying the circuit board down. "What did you want to talk about? Is everything okay with you and Casey?"_

 _April's eyes drifted to the door before subconsciously bringing a hand across her lower torso. "Yes, yes everything's great-," here her voice faltered and Don's eyes briefly flicked down to sight the engagement ring that sparkled about one of her delicate fingers._

 _His gaze lingered too long._

 _"You're still okay with this, right Don?" April asked, tapping the finger in question._

 _"Yes, yes of course. Why wouldn't I be?" he looked away but the hesitation showed._

 _"Donnie, please. Let's not start this again," her annoyance was clear._

 _Don couldn't bite his tongue. "He's only marrying you because-"_

 _"Stop it Donnie!" April snapped. "He proposed because he loves me, you got that? Not because of, this," she waved her hand around her stomach._

 _"Still isn't right," Don muttered and instantly clamped a hand to his mouth at the fury that suddenly flared in April's eyes. The youth suddenly raised his hands in a placating gesture. "I'm sorry April, I am so sorry. That was uncalled for."_

 _"Damn right it was uncalled for Donnie!"_

 _Donatello winced and looked down shamefully. It was still a sensitive topic with him, this whole 'April and Casey' fiasco as he saw it._

 _"I didn't come here to be chastised Donnie, damn it I get enough of that from my aunt! I don't need my best friend piling on too, got that?!"_

 _Don twisted his fingers and twiddled his thumbs together, looking terribly ashamed as he stared down at them. "Yes April, I got it," he murmured quietly._

 _The anger subsided. "Good."_

 _Even now it still hurt though, he was the first person she had come to when she had discovered her pregnancy. He put on a brave face for her but inside he felt his heart crack. He was the one that April trusted implicitly. Whatever the problem, whatever the concern it was Don she came to each and every time._

 _Eight weeks later she dropped a second bombshell. In all honesty he should have seen it coming. Raph kept getting messages on his T-phone and kept sneaking out of the lair at all times of the night. He should have suspected he was meeting up with Casey, but he didn't. So when April came to him and showed him the ring, Donnie felt himself crumble inside. He didn't let it show. He knew for the longest time that April harboured deep affection for Casey and he had almost grown to accept that April wasn't going to return the feelings that he felt for her. He respected her decision, he really did but there had always been a small part of him that had secretly hoped that one day his far flung dream would come true._

 _But when the news came all that shattered and left Donnie feeling utterly bereft._

 _April and Casey had then made the official announcement of their engagement the next day. Everyone had been so happy and celebrations had slipped long into the night but after several hours of forcing smiles and enduring idiotic giggling Donnie had had enough. He couldn't keep the mask in place and slipped away, not to his lab but his room. He didn't want to be found. It would be the last place they would look for him. His misery had taken hold and he couldn't keep it in._

 _Donnie had never cried so hard in his life. It was selfish, childish, it was adolescent but he couldn't help it. Three words kept circling his mind. 'It's not fair. It's not fair.'_

 _April was a grown woman, able to make her own decisions and Donnie understood that but he couldn't help feeling rejected like some lovelorn puppy every time he saw her. It wasn't something he was proud of, neither was inadvertently making April suffer the brunt of his frustrations whenever the topic cropped up between them._

 _He had to stop acting like a slighted teenager. He had to stop behaving like a child. He had to grow up._

 _"This-this isn't how I wanted to start this conversation Don," April began again. Her voice had grown soft, almost uncertain and Donnie frowned. He recognised that tone of voice. She then looked up and a tension twisted in his chest. He knew that expression too. The one that she had worn all those weeks ago when had told Donnie that she was pregnant._

 _Don left the security of his desk but even as he approached April took a step back. The youth got even more concerned. "April what's wrong?"_

 _The redhead hesitated, hand resting on her blooming bump. She almost looked pained, as if she were fighting something within._

 _"April?" He said worriedly, hand now on her shoulder._

 _Finally she spoke. "Don, I-I think there's something wrong w-"_

 _"MOUSER!"_

 _Both snapped their gazes to the lab door._

 _"Mouser?" April glanced up at Donnie, a hand against his plastron._

 _Don instinctively pressed the hand over April's, frowning at the sudden cries coming from the main living area of the lair. "Stay here April," he said protectively, before snatching up his bo staff from the side of the door._

 _Upon entering the chamber Donnie's brothers and Casey had their weapons drawn and ready. In the centre of the room stood a solitary Mouser, seemingly paused and waiting orders._

 _Raph's hands twitched in hungry anticipation for some action. "C'mon! What are we waitin' for? Let's crush the metal son of bitch!"_

 _A weapon seemed ready to spin from his hands when a sudden command was barked urgently from behind them._

 _"Yame! Hold Raphael."_

 _"Why sensei?"_

 _Raph received a sharp clip round the back of his head for his insubordination, wincing before letting his fist drop._

 _"It is a message, I received a similar one several years ago," the tall rat passed his sons to stand before the Mouser. He scowled. "Speak!"_

 _Donnie's hands flexed about the shaft of his staff as he watched. Half a second passed and a holographic projection issued from the metal beast's red eye._

 _Don stepped back as a life sized image of the Shredder appeared before them._

 _"What the hell does he want?"_

 _Splinter motioned Raphael to silence and the artificial apparition spoke. "Greetings Hamato Yoshi."_

 _"To what do we owe this pleasure Saki?" the father replied levelly, ignoring the insincerity the greeting was delivered with._

 _"I have reached a final solution in regards to you and your so called family, an ultimatum if you will."_

 _Donnie watched as his father's eyes narrowed and he swallowed nervously in spite of himself. There sounded like a lot of conviction in the Shredder's tone of voice, more so than usual. A trickle of nerves slowly travelled down the mutant teen's spine and he eyed Splinter closely for a response._

 _"Where are you taking this Saki?" the tall rat said carefully._

 _"Come, face me, you and your freakish family or the city will forfeit." The Shredder then stepped aside revealing both where he was and what he was planning._

 _Donatello's face immediately fell into a curious frown, his keen eyes taking in the metallic structure that had been revealed. It seemed to be of Krangg origin, big, complex and quite simply terrifying. His eyes widened as he realised what the Shredder had planned. Over the years, had he really become that mentally unstable?_

 _Donnie shook his head. "Er, guys, this, this isn't good." he stammered._

 _"Details Donnie," his oldest brother prompted._

 _His hand flexed nervously about his bo and he found his voice again. "I-I think that device is a seismic resonator."_

 _"A siezmo what?"_

 _Donnie bit his tongue, holding back the unnecessary frustration he felt when he had to simplify things down to the bare bones for certain others to understand. "Earthquakes. It will cause earthquakes on a massive scale," he replied, the tension in his voice clear._

 _"An earthquake machine?" Mikey squeaked in alarm. "That's bad, that's like really, really bad dudes!"_

 _A disturbing laugh issued from the projection. It stopped abruptly and the Shredder stepped back into frame. "You have one hour or the device will be activated," with no further word the transmission cut out and the inert Mouser squealed back into life. It lurched forward at the nearest target. A green crystal cane came spearing down, shattering the red eye and piercing the robot's brain in a fraction of a second._

 _The electrical pops and fizzes soon crackled into nothing until all that was left was a deep ominous silence. Donnie looked to his father with the rest of his brothers. The awful proposition had been given to Splinter, he alone had to make the decision._

 _Finally the father spoke. "I fear my sons that we must do as the Shredder requests."_

 _"He wouldn't really set off that 'device', would he Master Splinter?"_

 _The once man shook his head, not as an answer to Raphael but a show of resignation. Their family would never be truly be at peace until the Shredder no longer posed a threat._

 _"I do not know Raphael. I do know that I do not want to take that chance."_

 _"Well, it's decided then," Leonardo sheathed his twin blades. "We face him together. Donnie, you think you disarm that Doomsday device?"_

 _Startled out of his thoughts the ten blinked and galnced at his oldest brother. "Huh? Oh, I'd need to get a close up look at it but yeah, I should be able to," it was a Krangg device but he'd dismantled and disarmed many a Krangg technology in his short life. Why should this be any different? The Shredder was the main concern._

 _"C'mon guys, lets go."_

 _Without hesitation the turtles headed for the turnstiles._

 _"Count me in!" Casey suddenly hollered chasing after them._

 _Following at a calmer pace, Splinter's resonant voice sounded. "We couldn't ask you to risk your life Casey. You have your own family to look out for, do you not?"_

 _The older teen hesitated, casting his sights back. April caught eyes with him and watching this all in the background, Donnie felt the usual pang in his chest._

 _"I can take care of myself Master Splinter."_

 _"No April. It is far too dangerous. Please, stay here."_

 _"No!" April strode forward and stared them all down belligerently. "You are not leaving me here. You know I have faith in all of you but if that seismic resonator is triggered somehow, do you really think the best place for me is here,_ _underground_ _?"_

 _"Well, it's debatable," Donnie suddenly found himself saying._

 _As April's eyes swerved in his direction, he suddenly found it very important to stare at a crack in the floor. "Well, I mean the underground can be one of the safer places to be during an earthquake, if say you were in a small structure, however, long underground structures such as tunnels or pipes, like the sewers, can be at risk if they cross the fault, and there is significant displacement between the two plates."_

 _Raphael huffed dryly. "You can also 'be at risk' on top of a building Donnie."_

 _What sounded like a frustrated sigh sounded from the centre of the group. "Look, everyone's right. There really is no safe place to be in an earthquake but we don't have the time to stand here and argue about it," Leo was right. "April, Casey come with us but stay outside of the building. Look out and cover us, compromise?" he stared pointedly at April._

 _It was clear that the redhead wasn't completely happy with the proposal but finally conceded. "Okay Leo."_

 _Leonardo nodded. "C'mon then guys. Let's give the Shredder more than he bargained for."_

 _Without hesitation the family swept out of the lair for the last time._

 _XXXX_


	4. Drakin Attack

**Hey dear readers, it's been too long, hasn't it? I do apologise but real life and the dreaded writer's block took its toll on me. I'm going to try my hardest to focus on this story now but I can't promise what life may decide to throw at me in between but like I said I will try...**

 **So, back to the present again, enjoy :)**

XXXX

Chapter 3 Drakin Attack

Donnie awoke the next morning with an intense chill sliding mercilessly through his bones. It was but a passing sensation though as past memories still gushed freely about the rivers of his mind. Nothing else mattered at that moment in time, until a familiar voice jolted him back to the present.

"Don? Donnie, don't tell me you stayed out here all night-," a slight cry of alarm followed and the turtle blinked in confusion.

"What's wrong April?"

"What's wrong?!" the redhead exclaimed immediately crouching in front of him. "You've been out here all night, without a coat and you've been bleeding!" she reached out for his bloodstained cheek, worry creasing her brow. "What the hell happened Donnie?"

In a flash the youth realised what he must have looked like. He turned over his bloodied hand his eyes drifting to the congealed wounds of his lacerated digits. April's sights instantly flicked down and she seized his hand. Donnie winced.

"Donnie! How'd this happen, huh?"

Don looked away. "I-I caught it on the naginata blade, I-"

"Don you're so much damn smarter than this! You could've attracted a freaking drakin down on our heads!" she pounded a fist against his shoulder and frowned again. "And you're freezing to the touch. My god Donnie, were you trying to kill yourself?!"

Donnie bowed his head shamefully. Sorry seemed so woefully pathetic a word to say given the circumstances but he murmured it anyway. "I'm sorry April."

The young woman huffed and clambered to her feet. "Hold on a minute," and she disappeared back inside the building. Only seconds later she reappeared hefting her satchel and snatched Don's discarded coat up from the ground. He watched mutely as April slung the coat across his shoulders and flopped down next to him digging through the contents of her bag. Finally she pulled out several lengths of clean cloth and a small bottle.

"Hand," she ordered.

Not able to look her in the eye Donnie raised his wounded hand to her. He felt her tug roughly at the buckles that held the leather gauntlet in place. Moments later April yanked the glove off and immediately poured some of the bottle over his thick fingers.

A slight wince crinkled Don's features followed by a hiss of pain that he couldn't hold back. He'd forgotten how much he hated iodine despite it being the best disinfectant for wounds. It stung like the devil, not that he would have admitted to it. His brothers would probably have a field day with that information.

"Damn it Donnie, you know we don't have much iodine left. The last thing we want is for a wound to get infected. I mean, what, what would I do?" April said in a now calmer, more concerned tone.

Don peered up at her as she worked diligently on his injury cleaning up the blood and finally bandaging his fingers up securely. April was getting too good at this. Over the years the mutant had attained a goodly number of cuts and grazes but whenever he'd stop to tend them April always took over despite his protests. In the end he just automatically allowed her. It was easier that way.

April finally finished, staring at him steadily as Don pulled his glove back on and buckled it. She made a soft noise and he glanced up at her.

"You didn't answer my question."

"Question?"

April huffed impatiently and stared back at him with a look that had become all too familiar. "What would I do if anything happened to you?"

Donnie opened his mouth to say something and immediately snapped it shut again. He had no idea how to answer her question. He'd been careless and he'd put her, he'd put them both in unnecessary danger. Most of the predatory mutants that now roamed this desolate landscape were blood trackers. The guilt still reflecting in his eyes he held April's gaze steadily.

"April, I promis-"

Immediately April's hand shot up and pressed two fingers to his lips. "Don't. Just, don't Donnie," concern burned fiercely back in her suddenly intense stare. "Please Donnie, don't make promises which are impossible to keep."

Don swallowed back what he was about to say, feeling April's words burrow deep down inside of him. She moved her soft fingers and he sat there a moment longer before answering again. He never once looked away from her. "I will try my very hardest not to let this sort of thing happened again."

April leant back on her heels and finally smiled. She extended her hand as she stood up. "C'mon D, one last rekkie of this place and let's get out of here, huh?"

Don managed a small smile. "Sounds like a plan chief."

April chuckled lightly, brushing her hand playfully across his brow as he finally stood up. She then took him by the hand and pulled him back into the building. "Let me show you what else I've found," and she smiled at him softly.

XXXX

An hour later, a ration lighter and a few useful items salvaged the pair were ready to move on. April was hitching her now somewhat heavier bag over her shoulders when Don suddenly ducked back into the building.

"Donnie! What are you doing now? I thought we were leaving!" she called.

Several frustrating minutes passed and April frowned and was about to duck back inside herself when the turtle startled her by stepping back out in front of her.

"What was that all about?"

"Just double checking that we hadn't forgotten anything April," he answered although the bag on his shoulder looked heavier somehow.

April 'hmmm'd' to herself but let it go.

XXXX

It was slow going for the next few hours that the pair travelled. The dusty terrain became rocky and extra care had to be taken to traverse it. The last thing they needed was a twisted ankle.

April kept feeling Donnie's eyes slip in her direction which always reverted back to the path they travelled whenever she glanced up. Subconsciously her hand drifted out to glance across the turtle's fingers when a guttural avian shriek sliced through the calm atmosphere.

Instinctively Don's hand came out, preventing April moving any further. Her own hand made to unholster her rifle.

"Don't. Get behind me."

April frowned, the stubborn gleam reflecting in her eyes as she reluctantly released the barrel.

A secondary screech suddenly sounded and Donnie pulled April to the ground into the little cover that they had. "Urgh! Damn it Donnie!" the girl hissed.

"Shhh!" the turtle's eyes were fixed on something above them. Silently he pointed.

April suppressed a gasp as the screeches resumed. "Two of them?"

"Yeah," Donatello nodded. "Hard to tell from this distance but I think they're both bulls."

"Great," April muttered. "Two male drakin, which means that somewhere in this delightful neighbourhood there's a freaking dame lurking around."

The airborne battle above continued as the most dangerous mutants (as far as Donnie and April were concerned) fought for breeding rights for that territory's resident female. Easily the size of a full grown rhino, they were in essence a fascinating creature. It was hard to tell what the secondary DNA in its genetic makeup was but in their outward appearance there looked like giant vultures with feather adorned reptilian tails lined by tusk like spikes. Scales plastered their bodies in random patches, impenetrable by bullet or bolt. By some weird mutation they also had the capability to breathe fire, hence the name they had earned themselves.

The battle, like all drakin bull battles tended to be, was brutal and violent and as it nearly always was, deadly. An awful screech resonated through the airs. Above there was a font of blood and the looser plunged to the ground like a stone. The corpse slammed into the earth a safe distance away and the hidden pair watched as the victor let out a crow of triumph before wheeling about and leaving, no doubt in search of the female that he had just won the breeding rights too.

When Donnie deemed it safe, they stood and quickly surveyed the immediate area. "C'mon," Don pulled on April's arm.

Without question April quickly followed Donatello's lead, stopping dead in her tracks when she realised where he was taking her. Toward the fallen drakin. "Donnie! Please tell me we're not going where I think we're going."

Up ahead of her the youth stopped and turned. "What are you talking about?"

"Let me make this clear Donatello, there is no way you're taking me anywhere near that monster's body."

The turtle's face creased in disappointment.

"Every predator and scavenger in a fifteen mile radius will be converging on that corpse Donnie. You know that. It's a good thing that drakin don't eat their own. It's their only redeeming feature really."

The young mutant looked somewhat crushed. His injured hand was pressed against his mouth as April's words seemed to swirl about his thoughts. The girl watched as he finally dropped his arm to his side and slowly nodded. As Donatello looked her in the eye, April suddenly felt a horrible pang in her breast.

"Of course, you're right April. Sorry. My natural curiosity got the better of me again," he unnecessarily readjusted the straps of his backpack and pointed to the east. "We'll- er, we'll skirt around the body. Give it a wide a berthe as possible," he ended quietly.

April watched as Don took the lead and paused. The record player. It had been risky to allow her to play it but he divulged her, made her smile and watched out for her whilst she was swept away by a wave of nostalgia.

So, what was she doing? Stamping out a rare opportunity for Donatello to use his amazing intellect, to maybe help them better understand their enemy. Something to make her best friend happy. Damn it. After what she had put him through last night it was the very least she could do.

"Donnie wait."

The tall turtle glanced over his shoulder confusedly as he stared back at her.

"It'll take those predators four hours at least to reach that corpse, they know better than to take up land in a drakin's territory."

"You mean-?"

"If we don't linger too long, I can't see any harm in examining the body as long as we're careful and vigilant."

The expression that spread across Donatello's face made April's heart do a giddy little flip. There was that inquisitive teenager that she thought she would never see again.

"Thank you April! Thank you!"

Before she knew what was happening, Donnie had grabbed her hand and swiftly began to guide her across the way to the fallen drakin's body.

XXXX

Thirty minutes later and the carcass lay before them, wounds oozing and a nasty smell beginning to rise and scratch at the backs of the couple's throats.

"Ergh! This thing smells like it's already going off," April grimaced.

"Fascinating," her companion muttered to himself, his keen eyes quickly taking in the creature before him.

Neither of them had seen a drakin up close, although several years ago they had been fortunate enough to stumble across a skeleton. There was only so much you could learn from bones though, especially without a computer.

Donatello wasted no more time. Setting down his bag, he took out a logbook and pencil and began his preliminary inspection.

XXXX

It didn't take too long before the examination became a lot more visceral. Time was of the essence and Donatello seemed determined not to waste a second of it. April had to turn away at that point. The smell was bad enough but to see the beast's innards laid bare was a bit much even for her strong constitution.

"April, you've got to see this!" Donnie kept saying at random intervals as he capered around the gigantic specimen. "It's just so fascinating!"

"If it's all the same to you Donnie I'll wait until you're done and you can tell me about it when we're back on our way."

"Oh my gosh-," Don then uttered. "April, I mean it, you really have to see this."

"No thank you D-"

"I've figured out how they breathe fire!"

"Really?" the redhead quirked an eyebrow.

"Really, really! Look."

April turned, holding onto her bile. Donatello was poking about in the drakin's mouth. She kept a hand pressed firmly against her own.

"They have two valves at the base of their throat. I think one projects out a flammable venom and the other releases a gas that ignites it. It's an ingenious mutation despite it being the most vulnerable part of the creature."

"How?" April said with a curious frown.

"Well, this back palate is fleshy and unprotected. One clear shot could rupture the gas lung. Heck, get an explosive bolt on target and the gas would literally explode."

April processed this information with a look of consternation pulling at her face. "So what you're telling me Donnie is, the only sure way to kill a drakin is to shoot a flaming arrow down its throat?"

"Pretty much."

"That's a hell of a small target Donnie, like shooting a torpedo down the tailpipe of the Death Star."

"Well, I suppose so," Donnie shrugged.

"Well, that should be simple," April responded with raised eyebrows. "I'll just get Luke Skywalker of the phone shall I?"

"Luke Skywa-?" April released a chuckle and Donatello snorted before breaking into a throaty giggle. "Skywalker, I get it!"

Chuckling like idiots the pair of them soon gathered their belongings, (Donnie snagging a few precious drakin samples) before carrying on their way. It would be quite a while before they laughed like that again.

XXXX


End file.
